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Please note, I am not a native English speaking person! Corrections of orthographical and grammatical mistakes are always welcome. The same goes for wrong use of words or phrases. Thanks for your cooperation!

'Keen-edged!' Crazy Sue thought.
The Sidewinder had swept close under her left wing before it  had crashed into the ground and exploded. Thank goodness, Sue was miles away before the shockwaves could have affected her. This other jet was bothersome. Yes, of course, it was also dangerous. But most of all it was bothersome.
She had been on her way to the Throne-Síd as it had appeared behind her like a police car on the highway when you and your friends are involved in a high-speed race. And the cops used to appear very fast. Especially when one of the racers is an F-15 E jet rolling along the road way at a speed of nearly Mach 1. Sue was talking out of experience.
Yes, police cars were also bothersome, but there was something really nice about them: they usually could not fly.
But this plane could. And it stuck to Crazy Sue's tail like a moth to fly-paper, or like Rumble to a TV set... It followed each of her maneuvers absolutely exactly - quite like a shadow. Sue checked the aggressor's cockpit with her radar. There was a human being inside, but it couldn't be the pilot. It was a biochemical fact that a human being needs half a second to realize what happens and a minimum of half a second more to react to it. This jet was able react to her own actions within microseconds.
Maybe another Transformer...
Another missile nearly ripped her hull. Sue dove into a nearby valley. Her radar told her that the Sidewinder had already lumbered a group of nine pines. The explosion lit up a sign on the tail of the other jet as it passed by the inferno: a black bishop in front of a four-field chessboard.
"Lumber-Jack, you are one of Bishoph-Baby's new Flying Shadows", Crazy Sue sighed. "That explains everything..."
It was time to get rid of that nerd, or she would be late for her date with Starscream and then they would miss half of the movie they wanted to watch.
Sue ejected a flare to confuse the heat-seeking missile behind her. It fell for the decoy and followed the flare.
Mother Earth! If she still had her mind Sue would have lost it now... She was a high-skilled airborne warrior; she knew every flying trick of two planets and she had tried them all. Even Starscream would not be able to follow her for more than a minute, but this stupid Bishop-jet had been pursuing her for more than ten now! She tried every maneuver an air craft could do. Stop... She had tried every trick an air craft was able to do that had jet engines!
'Lumber-Jack, gotcha!' Crazy Sue grinned inside.
She dove deeper, sweeping close over the trees. She could feel the tree-tops tickle along her fuselage. It was hard for her not to giggle. Eight seconds later, the black F-15 E turned hard port into another valley, still pursued by the Shadow. A few miles in front of her appeared exactly what Crazy Sue needed - a steep slope made of pure rock. She steered straight onto it without getting slower. The Shadow was at her tail. Sue went on, the rock was fast coming closer.
The Shadow's autopilot was programmed to follow its target's actions, not to react to the environment. So it continued to follow.
"Three, two, one... Hasta la baby, Vista!" Sue cut off her turbines and channelled full power into the front anti-gravitation engines. In other words, she came to a full stop. Giving up a few meters of altitude, she opened  the way for the Shadow to crash into the rock at a speed of Mach 1.8.
The metal screeched painfully as the collision's force compressed the jets hull. The craft burst under the pressure microseconds before it exploded.
Crazy Sue transformed and looked thoughtfully at the burning wreck below. The passenger had had no time to eject. There was no chance for him to survive. Crashing into a rock at supersonic speed means not just to be blown into smithereens, it means being splattered into molecules. And then the heat of the explosion...
"Water and CO2... That is all you are now", Sue noticed. "Hey, has no-one ever told you that these things cause the greenhouse-effect?"
She shrugged.
"Humans! Even when they die they are bad for the environment. Whatever..."
Her chronometer told her that there was plenty of time to get back to the Thron-Síd. No need to hurry. She retransformed into jet-mode.

R. G. Smolder sat on the bank of a small mountain river watching his fishing-hooks float dancing on the water. The air was clear and filled with the scent of the wilderness around him. R. G. took the little whiskey bottle beside him and put it to his lips. Then he leaned back his head to take a long swig and... froze! A black F-15 E Eagle jetfighter was crossing the sky above him, very close to the tree-tops. It flew slowly and by fits and starts like a swimming frog. And more, it flew upside-down! There was no sound of any engine but the angler was sure that he could hear a female voice singing "Always look on the bright side of life..!"
R. G. bowed back his head without drinking. He turned the bottle around and watched the whiskey as it poured onto the forest ground...

Deep under the ocean within the Decepticon headquarters Megatron checked his private terminal for messages. He found one that had originally been classified as "extremely important" and then been reclassified as "absolutely ignorable". Both classifications were done by the sender. The Decepticon leader was puzzled. If the message was ignorable why had the writer not just deleted it instead of sending it? So Megatron opened the file and read it.
He read it once.
He read it twice.
He read it three times, shook his head, sighed "Sue..." and - for the health of his cerebro chips - decided to ignore the message.
 

Yo, Meg! Starscream and I want to go to the drive-in movie theatre on Saturday. They are showing "Top Gun" - or was it "Hot Shots"? Whatever... To be here on time he had to leave the undersea base on 23:36 local time. He needs about 2.4 hours for the flight. Please take care that he leaves on time. But... they broadcast a thunderstorm along the east-coast... that means he should take off half an hour earlier. But... if he takes the southern course, he could probably circle the storm and would need only a quarter of an hour more. But... it could be that the storm will reach Florida earlier than expected; that would mean three-quarters of an hour more. Maybe Mag could take care of the weather... Oh, that reminds me, Starscream is in the Síd this week! I can tell him myself that he should be there on time. What for? He is there anyway. Whatever, forget this message! Ciao! P. S.: In case you haven't already deleted this file: Regards to your better half. P. P. S.: A submarine flew over a cross-road when the traffic light was red. How many eggs are inside the fridge? 32, because an engine has no fish-bones. P. P. P. S.: Sorry, I forgot to sign. It's me, Sue!